5am popcorn.

Its 530am and Im eating popcorn.


Why is the last hour and a half always drags on??? So to make the time go by, I stuff my face.
"Good" solution since Im tryin to lose weight. But this is not why I decided to write again before I get off and go home to my wonderful bed and go into a coma-like state of sleep.

so much to look forward to huh?

Anyway, this whole night has been uneventful, which is pretty good when you work in ICU. You don't really want "events" happening in ICU. You just want ur patients to get better as the meds and pumps and iv's work to heal they're ailing bodies. So with an uneventful night, it left me to think about things to avoid hitting my head on keyboard from lack of sleep.

Friends...that's what i thought about.

The ones that I truely cherish, the ones I still have, the ones I have lost and ones I want to get close to. In my short lifetime I have made lots of friends but there are some that I still keep and wanna keep close to my heart. And there are some I have lost that I wish I could regain. For the past 24hrs I have gone thru all the names that have crossed my path that have made a difference and an impact in my life whether good or bad.

And wish I could thank you.

for everything...


KAM-You believed in me and accepted me even when I was messed up. You were instrumental in helpin me begin on the path of coming back to Christ. I am forever grateful.

MO-I love you like a sister and thank you for showing me what a Real Friend is.

JAS- I pray for you constantly and hope one day you come back to Christ. Thank you for showing me that you can still be strong even in your weakest moments.

DH-You once showed me a glimpse of what true love can be and then you showed me heartache. Thanks to you, I now know the difference.

DW-You were the example of what NOT to do in a relationship. What to run from when you see it.

KK-There are so many times I wonder what you're doing. We were tight during Youth group days and I think of you often. You showed me loyality and how you're supposed to be a friend no matter what. Maybe one day we can renew the "pact" we had in high school. (I still have that little note we wrote each other "sealing the deal")

FC-Girl we STILL talk...you showed me friendship and love can go a long way and distance doesnt have to be a factor.

DD-I pray for you alot. Hope one day we can be friends again. I miss our many convo's and your laughter. I know God was dealing with your Heart and breaking it, Hope HE still is. You taught me that New beginnings can be hard but they are necessary for growth.

RY- You are one of the two that I've met online that I have remained friends with. Has it been 5 yrs goin on 6??? Even though you "deserted" me and ran off and got married and MOVED to foreign country! Yes we still talk online and I miss you very much. Thanks for always havin that ear to listen and lettin me see a that a man can cry and still be a man.

SK-Man we have been through so much together and we are STILL friends. You're 3,000 miles away and yet you were still thoughtful enough to send me a Valentine Day text. I pray for you and hope that you find salvation. Thanks for showin me that even though you can have everything, without God it's nothing. I pray one day that YOU learn that.

EP-I have only known you for a short time but I learned alot from you. Your frankness and honesty is breath of fresh air. I wanna know you more and I pray for you everyday. Thank you for being you and never waverin in your stance.

VS-The things we share and have shared are sacred and I treasure our friendship. Your compassion for people is so big and I am glad to call you friend...no SISTER.

JESUS CHRIST-You, by far are my best friend. YOU are constantly teaching me and showing me things about me and what You have in store for me. I love You with all my heart. Thank YOU for Your amazing grace and sacrifice for me.

So as my shift ends in 45min (thank the LORD) know that these words are coming from my heart and are deep rooted into my soul.

I love you all...

Just thinking thoughts....

Hello, my name is Stupidity and I am working 24 hours STRAIGHT.

Yes , yes I am still at my job on the account I decided to say OKAY to working a double shift. 24hours..long time. Im cool now but i know around 3am my body will have officially stopped talking to me and I am gonna have to down like 10gallons of coffee and soda just to stay awake.

But I get paid mad overtime...hmmm...maybe I can brave this.

As I sit here at my desk wishing for my bed right now, I am thinking of this journey I talked about in my last blog. God sure is funny sometimes. The journey I thought I was about to take is not the one Im on. I mean this one is far better. I am learnin alot..about myself. I am actually excited about it. What better journey to be on than to be on one with God? Having Him teach you about yourself. The "hated" holiday just passed and I am learning that I don't have to hate it. Matter of Fact I am beginning to actually like it...yes even in this short amount of time. And its because of HIM. HE is teaching me to love and it is really..how do you say..off the chain! I can't wait to see what lies around the corner.

In other events, still haven't moved in the other house yet..and that's not only drivin me crazy but also my mom. She and my brother are goin to move in with me but we have to wait till the other people to get out. I have notion to rent them a truck and say "here ya go..handle it." But I digress. I know it'll all work out but dang...can a sista get a break?? LOL

Man I just realized I have been working for 15hrs straight now...only NINE hours to go!

Life is becoming pretty interesting lately. I may be embarking on a journey that I never thought I'd take. All I can say is the God is funny sometimes. So here I go, headed into the unknown, guided by my Father.

My Enemy

I just discovered who my enemy is..well besides the obvious one. IT lurks around every corner and tries to ambush me. And with the Hated Holiday coming up, It seems like it's bringing friends to fight with me. See, the last 4 days I have been sick, I mean really sick. The kind of "can't get out of bed cuz I have 101 fever sick" And It was right there, taunting me. BUT I know who is in my corner....my DAD. HE was there to help me fight It. I am not gonna let IT get the best of me although I want to give up sometimes. I know my Dad won't let me. Shoot, I won't LET ME. This is a battle that I have to win, without anyone's help except my Father. I am not gonna let IT win. I know who you are now and be afraid...be very afraid...

cherries...

Who came up with the saying "Life is a bowl of cherries"? What the heck does that mean anyway? I don't even like cherries! The way my life is going right now is mixture of rotten and ripe ones. I'm just pickin out the rotten ones now. Maybe then it'll be sweet.